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SHEEP FARMING IN THE FALKLANDS by Dai Pest from 2000

The new wrongly named Millennium was barely upon us and already games were being played throughout the British lsles. For the Mighty Martyrs it was a short trip across the border to Clevedon, for the fans it was a chance to show Welsh dominance over the English. This for me was a game that Jimmy Mullen's boys needed to win to boost morale after being on the wrong end of a seven goal thriller, seven days earlier, against those plastic Welsh bastards Newport County.

For myself and the rest of the DMFM entourage it was our last piss-up of the Christmas festivities. The rendezvous point was to be the Park View for a quick beverage before departure. The Ginger Giant was the first on the scene, although I don't know why because the old man can't drink much these days. He was accompanied by his boy who in two years time will be able to drink more than his old man. By the time Wingnut and l arrived, Wolvsey and Nathan had been joined by Typey, who may I add was a little worse for …

Bath = 3 points by Chairman Mao from issue 30

It's my favourite trip of the season, the one you look for when the fixtures start in August. And that's the best way to describe going to Bath usually, a good trip. For the Dial M for Merthyr boys, Bath means the train taking the strain.

So the omens weren't good this season when the numbers going began to drop almost as quickly as the Martyrs down the table. It was Wingnut's birthday but the thought of Twerpton Park wasn't exactly adding to the party spirit. Let's be honest Bath has never been a great hunting ground for the Martyrs, I can only recall winning once there in the last decade or so (perhaps 1'm wrong but it feels like that). Although the 0-6 defeat there against Bristol Rovers in the FA Cup must go down as the most enjoyable hammering ever. Peter Jones whacking their goalscorer up the arse as their player was wheeling away to celebrate is surely the best way to get sent off in the history of football. Chris Williams's penalty save sparked …

On Flanders Fields by Chairman Mao

Time can be many things. We’re told that it can heal almost anything but mostly a broken heart. It can also humble you with comparisons and shadows of the past. Recently I was privileged to visit Flanders as part of the Welsh Government’s commemoration of the century of the start of the Third Battle of Ypres, more commonly known as the Battle of Passchendaele, during the First World War. The Welsh memorial at Langemarkon the outskirts of Ypres is magnificent and a worthy memorial for every Welsh soldierwho served on the Western Front during one of the most brutal battles in history. The memorial was unveiled in 2014. The cromlech area has now been completed and supplemented with further stones from Pontypridd to represent the Welsh Regiments who fought across the trenches during the long months of the battle. The conditions for the battle were horrendous with the unusual summer combined with the massive artillery fire ensuring that the battlefields were a swamp as the local canals and r…

Déjà Vu By Wandering

We’ve been in this dark place many times before, but this is the first time that it has been with a fan elected Board! 
Are we experiencing a ‘Ground Hog Day’ existence once again? This isn’t what a supporter run club should aspire to. However, there are reassuring indications that it appears the current financial situation is manageable if handled carefully with no further debt being incurred.
Perhaps we all need a First Class honours degree in ‘Hindsight’ to fully comprehend why we face this predicament once again. It is a credit to the Board for holding their hands up, admitting their mistake and taking positive action to deal with the situation. 
The business case for the immediate future,identifying operational costs, with targets and objectives clearly specified, must be published soon (1st September was promised!) in the new emerging Business Plan. This will allow the owners to monitor carefully whether the Board are moving in the right direction to safeguard the future heritage o…

Resignation Letter by Wolvesy

It’s strange how it happens. One day you find yourself sweating over injury news about Ryan Prosser or scouring the fixture list for the prime games and then you discover that you just don’t care anymore. 
I don’t care about the Martyrs anymore, it’s quite liberating to write those words. After 43 years of following the ups and downs of the team I seem to have hit a wall of apathy and to be honest dismay with the club at the top of Park Terrace. I’ve struggled health wise for a while now and watching Saturday’s heroes was once an oasis from the stresses and strains of modern life but after a while I realised that the governance of Merthyr Town FC and the lack of accountability at the top of the club was adding to my frustrations. The same people who propped up the previous regime now seem to be back in the board room, how do they do that? I wish I had that level of confidence to just walk out the door, take on the new club’s philosophy and then return as if nothing had happened. As Gro…

SAY IT AIN'T SO, JIMMY? by Chairman Mao from the early 2000s

It's been the match that has stood out for all Martyrs fans since the season started, another opportunity to educate our neighbours from Gwent in the social etiquette of non-league football. Our chance to provide their supporters with the fundamental requirements for football at our level; hospitality in our clubhouse, four sides to a ground with no segregation (and no crowd trouble). What we couldn't rely on was what would happen on the lush green lawn that is Penydarren Park. It had been a tidy Christmas but to be honest it was all going to be little more than a warm-up for the main event; Merthyr Tydfil -vrs- Newport County.

I'm glad they've adopted their old name, it just seems more honest and gives a historical edge to matches. Against my better judgement I felt quietly confident about the encounter, the Martyrs record against the Gwenties isn't very good but recent performances if not results had been encouraging with the lads attempting to play a passing gam…

Are we approaching crunch time? by Wandering

Financially 2015/16 was an extremely challenging year for the Trust. A period when the ground was being redeveloped and there were no permanent bar facilities on site, but once again the Club punched above their playing weight as it lifted the Southern League Cup for the first time in sixty years. Even a safe mid-table finish failed to persuade Steve Jenkins to stay with the Martyrs and the Board reacted quickly to appoint Gavin Williams as manager in the summer months.

Broadly, I think you could say that last year’s accounts were strong in some places and weak in others – an overall loss was posted for the second time in three years as a result of the investment in the infrastructure, but this was fortunately absorbed by the existing surplus profit in the Reserves that were carried forward. This possibly reinforced the cautious approach of maintaining a consistent, sustainable strategy which provided the foundation for last seasons play-off challenge in only our second season back at …

Molesey (Away) FA Trophy - January 1991 by Dai Cunny

A decent Martyrs team (actually the team was crap, as always). For three intrepid explorers, who travelled up over ye old Severn Bridge to that sad and rather smelly country, the day was more memorable for an event which took place in the toilets at half time (ooooooo) than the game itself.
It was myself, Bungle & Will who lumbered down to the law courts during the depths of the harsh Glamorganshire winter, to experience the delights of a Trevor Meyrick away trip to London. These were the days when you were actively encouraged to carry alcohol on away trips. The more the better. In fact it was common place for fans to be turned away from one of Trevor's busses for not carrying the required quota of eighteen cans of elephant beer and a kilo of whizz. This almost caused the first mishap of the day as Will, upon inspection, only had seventeen cans in his possession. Things were looking ropey for a few moments until the great man produced a two litre bottle of the demon voddy whic…

Crossroads by Colin Davies

Amongst the laughter, pints and general celebrations from the news that our erstwhile Chief Executive had left the club there came a realisation that we had reached another of those crossroads that will hopefully direct us over the horizon to where we want to arrive or could divert us to the purgatory of endless yo-yoing between divisions as the crowds dwindle to nothing under the leadership of blazer bores who judge a season by the best food at an away club boardroom.  As the social media keyboard warriors declared; “ding dong, the witch is dead”, but behind the harsh humour the main question remained unanswered – what happens now? Once again we saw the usual information vacuum from the Board, from the badly worded and insipid press statement to the familiar disappearance from our Chairman.  Does Merthyr Town FC have a crisis strategy? If so it shouldn’t include the head man, the face of the club, our leader disappearing as soon as the questions rain down from our most important stakeh…

IT'S JUST LIKE WATCHING.....TELETEXT?!? by Purple Cones from issue 21

I was sat there watching the telly, just me and my woman sitting there relaxed, the only thing spoiling the chilled atmosphere is me switching back and forth from Page 307 of Ceefax, no score, no worries, just a rush of adrenalin each time the pages scroll through to that page, 0-1, Mitchell, me bouncing around the room, to the fridge, a couple of tins, BBC2, The Outer Limits - shit programme, back to the Ceefax, 1-1, Drewitt - I knew it, you don't release players of his enthusiasm and commitment, still it's a point, back to the outer limits and some stupid scientist morality tale.
9.47pm, I scroll through to page 307, "come on boys, a last minute winner " eh 2-1, not for them , Stafford win in last minute, depressed, back to fridge, clear the stock of lager, slumped and dazed, appeal to the great Chairman in the sky who replies, "I sent you Addison, what more do you want?"
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